Army life

2nd book out of army lo! Been in the army for 3 weeks and its a very roller coaster ride i guess. In army i really feel that i'm still a crybaby.

Ok firstly to clarify i'm in rocky hill camp, school 4 3rd Company Platoon 1. Also known as samurai. Actually army is interesting in that u really learn and do things that u will never do in ur life. Its just that i really feel i worry about too many random stuff that makes me very emotional. First time was like 2nd or 3rd day in camp when we had the first foot drill. I just find it very confusing and also very afraid that i will mess up constantly due to not used to hearing malay commands. Tried to tahan but eventually just broke down and went to talk to my Platoon Commander. Thankfully he was a very nice person and really helped me alot like telling me its normal to be blur about it and etc.

After that i can't really rmb if i cried anymore in camp but last wk when i book in cried on mrt again cause the difference in feeling is really just too great. To be booking in straight after going to my grandpa's celebration is really shitty since its like so happy and joyous and everyone there talking but i just have to leave and go back tekong already. Just cannot stop it lo.

After that is last wed, at night after the route march. Before the route march i was alrdy feeling unwell with slight fever but during the march i nearly puked. Tahan till the end but didn't finish water parade after cause too much alrdy. Then at night got punishment etc but i still tahan again. In the end when go back took temp its 38.1(after i drank cold water). Think i really feverish till not thinking straight also.

Most of the time i just take things too personally. Always thinking that i will do wrong stuff and cause others to be punished, taking prep talk by commanders to motivate us too seriously and in the end feel that ownself too weak and shitty, blaming myself why not strong enough. I really don't know my limits and always can't help but question myself is it really the best i can do?

Even now when i think back of my Platoon serg caught me slping and ask me to stand, i just feel so... afraid? Fearful nature and emo easily is a bad combi for army. Must man up, 5wks to be stronger b4 BMT kicks in. Haiz. Ippt this week, which just means my RT will start. Sat book out in sight.

Farewell Event

First, smt that has nth to do with my title of post. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DERRICK NG ZI GEN! Lol yday was not at home anyway. Really need to start remembering people's bday instead of relying on FB. Zzzz

Anyway, yday went back to Ngee Ann for the 2nd last(most likely) time already. BEGV had a farewell dinner cum activities for us lah. Feels so bad that they spent so much money in the food. Seriously its too much food although everyone really enjoyed themselves. Const was the first senior to reach, at around 11plus? Followed by me at 12plus. Then boss and yana reached too followed by michelle. Then val and tim came while we were starting the NP catching. There are 3 groups of people who have a mission to find something at different areas while there will be a group of catchers trying to catch them. The catchers have to wear bells so that they cannot sneak up to the hiders/people with mission. Me boss and michelle together with some juniors were the catchers.

The game was super fun although tiring. The best group was constance that group lah super bluffers. Haven get caught they hide their stickers(have masking tape to identify caught anot) and fake kana caught then still can sit down and relac. Lol. After that i had to go bus stop help su take her steamboat and then tgt with winn and a junior we met there we went back to Loft loh. Had to start preparing and cooking the food le.

Then is eating time loh! Haha eat for 2 hours plus liddat. So scary all of us haha. Then after that slacked awhile with tim val ariff yana const in the room. Then we went up to Level 10 de rooms to bath. First time go up so high sia hahahah! Then bath, played card games and then also played dota AI. After that is go into room and chit chat until 3plus in the morn b4 everyone went to slp.

Then after that is wake up and clearing of the rooms. Sent const home to AMK b4 cab back home. Too much barang barang to go home via mrt. Yup. I really like this kind of bonding sessions. So fun hahaha. Will definably miss this.

Yup so thats another post after such a long time haha!

End of Poly Lessons

So i'm finally back here at blogger. Decided to at the very least do a post to partially mark a milestone of my life. So last friday was the last day of my poly school life. Only the exams are left which is 4 papers. After that poly will be officially over for me.

I still don't know whether i made the right choice back then choosing Environmental and Water technology but i can confidently say that going into this course had a really big effect on me. In a sense i'm lucky because i have a very kind and good clique who really helped me in my studies. They are a very cute bunch of girls that can crack jokes and laugh like mad over any single thing. Hahaha!

Being in EWT for 3 years, met so many different people in Ngee Ann, whether they dun like me, acted like they friendly with me but actually also hate me or dun like me but i'm too stupid to realize. Guess this really reflects on how i am i guess. In these last few weeks i keep analyzing people, their character and etc. I guess i'm just trying to at the very least dun make new or worst enemies i guess.

Leaving NP the thing i will miss the most is when we all went for the different events that was organized. Standard Chartered Marathon, OCBC cycle, Clean and Green week, Singapore Junior water prize etc. We always complain that those events were tiring and boring and etc but at the end of it all we really enjoyed ourselves, to be truthful. Even if i go uni i doubt i will be going for these events as a volunteer already, the most is as participants.

As we move on in life we leave behind more and more things. Friends, juniors, teachers and all. Really feels sad now that i'm really gonna leave soon.

So yeah, duno what else i wan to write about so that's about it. Think after exams will do another post bah.